Couple in Love
Many people have asked if individuals in heaven will have sexual organs and enjoy foreplay and sexual relations? If we search the internet, we find a variety of views about this topic. Some claim that since believers in heaven will be recognized as male and female they will have sexual organs and engage in sexual activities. Another says that believers will be able to get married because they view Jesus’ statement in Mathew 22: 29-32 as applying exclusively to Levirate marriage. Still others think that marriage is forever, so marriage will continue into heaven forever and couples will have eternal sexual relations. Those are just some of the views on this topic. But does the Bible teach that believers will be married or engage in sexual activity in heaven? The following answer has three parts.
Sex In the Present State
Genesis 2:22-24 teaches us that God instituted marriage between Adam and Eve on the sixth day of creation (Genesis 1:24-31). Then Genesis 2:7-25 provides details about the creation of Adam and Eve. Also, we are told that God made one male, Adam, and one female named Eve. Adam was created first and Eve was created from a portion of Adam’s side and was then brought to Adam (Genesis 2:22). Both of them were naked. That was God’s marriage ceremony for them. At that point, God gave them this biblical principle.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24 (NASB)
When we examine Matthew 19:3-6, we discover that Jesus quoted Genesis 2:24 when He explained that any marriage relationship is a covenant relationship between one biological man and one biological female before God and it should not to be broken.
Some Pharisees came to Jesus, testing Him and asking, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason at all?” And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, and said, ‘ FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:3-6 (NASB)
This fact is reinforced by Malachi 2:14-16 which reveals that when a man and woman become husband and wife, the marriage is binding. Within this marriage relationship, the couple is to follow God’s pattern for marriage. They are to produce children (Genesis 1:26-28). Immediately, that reveals that the man must be a biological male and the wife must be a biological female in order for them to procreate. Second, they are to meet one another’s sexual needs (1 Corinthians 7:2-5). This reveals that love, kissing, and sex are both not only permitted activities but obligations in the marriage relationship. God made males and females so that they would desire these activities, some more and some less. In addition, the wife is to submit to her husband, and he is to love her and lead her spiritually (Ephesians 5:21-31). Both of them are to submit to each other in different ways. Ephesians 5:31 quotes Genesis 2:24 also which reveals that these are elements of God’s pattern for a successful marriage. Proverbs 31 outlines the role of a wife in marriage and 1 Timothy 5:8 teaches that the husband is the primary provider for the family. God has also given the male the spiritual leadership over the children (Ephesians 6:4). That is the necessary background to the question, “Will people engage in love, kissing, and sex in heaven?”
Sex In the Heavenly State
Matthew 22: 23-32 tells us that on one day, the Sadducees asked Jesus a question about marriage. Because Jesus answered them by saying that no one will marry or be given in marriage in heaven but are like the angels, we must ask, “What does that mean?”
One view says God will only prohibit marriage, but He will allow sexual activities such as kissing and sexual activity. They claim that Adam and Eve engaged in sexual activity before they were married and they did not sin. They reason that there was no formal marriage or certificate issued. So they believe love, kissing, and sex will be permitted between anyone who desires to engage in such activity. But there are problems with this view. First, nowhere in Scripture does the Bible support this opinion. Second, Adam and Eve did not have a choice of partners. They were married by God who created them, as we have already discovered. God brought Eve to Adam. She was to be his wife. Adam did not have a choice. They were to become one flesh. They were to procreate. God told them to be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1;26, 28). Sexual activity was both commanded and expected as part of marriage. It is mere speculation for anyone to assume that people in heaven might be able to share a holy kiss (Romans 16:16; 1 Corinthians 16:20; 2 Corinthians 13:12; 1 Thessalonians 5:26). A holy kiss is devoid of any stimulation.
We must notice that elsewhere in Scripture, sexual activity outside of marriage is called sin. When sexual activity occurs before marriage, the sin is called fornication. When sexual activity occurs between two men or between two women, it is called unnatural and indecent acts (Romans 1:26-27). In sharp contrast, God encourages sexual activity between a husband and wife within the context of marriage (Malachi 2:14-16). It would have been a sin for Adam and Eve to have sex outside of marriage. How could God allow sex in heaven between anyone who just wanted to do it? In the Scriptures that is called promiscuity, and that is a sin. It is blasphemy to think that God would encourage or allow sexual activity between various individuals in heaven.
A second view says that since believers in heaven will be recognizable as male and female, they will have sexual organs and be able to engage in sexual activities. Yes, it is true that Scripture reveals that Moses and Elijah were recognizable as males on the Mount of Transfiguration (Matthew 17:1-8). But that does not mean they had male sexual organs in their immortal bodies. Further, sexual organs are primarily needed for reproduction. Reproduction is necessary in this life. Otherwise, the human population would have ceased to exist long ago. But Luke 20:34-36 teaches us that in heaven no one will die anymore. Thus there is no need to reproduce in heaven. Further, the joy of being in heaven with God will be more thrilling than anything else we might desire. Frankly, this view seems to be driven by individuals who are consumed with sexual activity. Life is much more than sexual activity.
A third view is that Jesus’ statement in Mathew 22: 29-32 applies exclusively to Levirate marriage. Proponents claim the context is about Levirate marriage, so they reason that Jesus was referring only to Levirate marriage. That is a weak argument since Jesus’ statement about marriage is very broad in its application. It is not at all clear that He limited His statement to Levirate marriage. This view is lacking in any serious support from Scripture. If this view is correct, then it defaults to being identical to the second view.
Conclusion
In summary, kissing and foreplay are primarily designed by God to stimulate a couple until they reach climax, resulting in procreation. This activity is for mortals who need to procreate because people are repeatedly dying. But many in our world now view procreation as an inconvenience. They view sexual activity as exclusively for pleasure. 2 Timothy 3:1-2a, 4 warns us that . . .
But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For men will be . . . treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God. 2 Timothy 3:1-2a, 4 (NASB)
Notice the warning about lovers of pleasure. That describes our world today. Many now consider love, kissing, and sex to be an ultimate emotional thrill. But in heaven, many things will change and so will sexual activity. Other things will become the new joys of heaven, and the priority will be knowing, praising, and worshiping our God. The plain sense meaning of Jesus’ statement is that marriage, including foreplay and sex which is a part of marriage, will not occur in heaven. I wonder what the water of life and the twelve kinds of fruit on the tree of life will taste like in heaven (Revelation 22:1-2)!