| |
Bible Question:
A young man in his 20s attends our church. He has gotten an
unbeliever pregnant. The situation is sad. He asked me for
advice, and I told him that it would be alright to marry
her. He asked about the verse that says Christians should
not be unequally yoked. I told him that he was unyoked when
he had sex. Was this good advice? Also, our associate pastor
told him that he needs to address the church with his sin.
I do not find that to be biblical. I did not share that with
him, but I do not know why he needs to address the church.
He has confessed it to the Lord and to the girl. What are
your thoughts?
Bible Answer:
There are two key passages in the Bible that speak to your
questions. But first, the young man needs to set his heart
not on on his past sin but on wanting to please God who wants
him to hunger after holiness or as Matthew 5:6 says, "righteousness."
| |
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they shall be satisfied. (NASB) Matt. 5:6
|
This is a heart issue. Otherwise, he lives his life by
a set of rules and by a desire to please God by fleeing sin.
How he proceeds from here is the difference between heartache
and joy.
Unequally Yoked.
He is not unequally yoked until he marries an unbeliever.
God does not want Christians marrying non-Christians. In the
Old Testament, God warned the Israelites to not marry men
and women from other nations. Here is the reason.
| |
Furthermore, you shall not intermarry with them; you
shall not give your daughters to their sons, nor shall
you take their daughters for your sons. For they will
turn your sons away from following Me to serve other
gods . . . (NASB) Deut. 7:3-4
|
When we come to the New Testament, we find that God still
does not want us to marry non-believers or non-Christians.
| |
Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership
have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship
has light with darkness? (NASB) 2 Cor. 6:14
|
Tell All.
The Bible says that the only time the church needs to know
about a person's sin is when the person does not want to stop
sinning. It is called church
discipline
. Matthew 18 says that we go to the person first in private
and encourage them to stop. If they do not listen to us, then
we take someone along and encourage them again to stop sinning.
If they do not stop after the second warning, then we take
a church leader with us. If they do not listen this third time,
then we tell the church and they are supposed to be removed
from the church at that time. So if he is willing to stop having
sex with the girl and he is willing to follow the guidance
of the church leaders, then the church congregation does not
need to be told. Otherwise, it is the elders who are to tell
the congregation and not the individual.
Conclusion:
The goal is not punishment but to rescue a Christian from living
a pattern of sin. God wants him to not marry the girl and
to not have sex outside of marriage. This honors our Creator.
This is His desire.
|
|
