Is masturbation a sin in marriage? I have not had physical
relations in eight months with my wife. It is very hard to
cope with not being intimate with her.
Is your wife interested in having physical relations? Based
on your question and in order to provide an answer, I have
assumed the answer is "no." While it is common
for men to have a stronger sexual drive than women, it is
not normal for a wife to have as little desire for physical
relations with her husband as you are describing.
God makes it clear in 1 Corinthians that both husbands and
wives have a need for physical relations.
In the following passage, God tells a husband to meet the sexual
needs of his wife and for a wife to meet the sexual needs
of her husband.
Let the husband fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise
also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have
authority over her own body, but the husband does;
and likewise also the husband does not have authority
over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving
one another . . . (NASB) 1 Cor. 7:3-5
He even tells us that the husband does not have control of
his body. His body belongs to his wife and the wife's body
belongs to her husband. God does not mean that we can abuse
one another and force the other to have physical relations.
A wife is to accommodate her husband's sexual needs and the
husband those of his wife.
A women once came to me for counseling and complained
that her husband did not want to have physical relations with her. She said that
he was not interested and so she wanted to know what to do. Most wives want a
physical relationship. How much varies from woman to woman and the same is true
from man to man. It is not true that all men want sex all the time. That is a
myth. The truth is that we are all different and God wants us to meet the needs
of our spouses - male or female.
I suspect your wife is struggling with some serious
issues. The issues may be with you, herself, or someone else. I would strongly
suggest that you encourage her to go for counseling. I would also encourage you
to start praying for her. If you are the issue, you should sit down with her
and have a long heart-to-heart talk. It starts with prayer and listening.
The Bible never specifically talks about masturbation. But
there are biblical principles that we can use to guide us.
A previous question
has already discussed this issue. I trust that you will find
Have you ever seen two rivers flowing smoothly and quietly
along until they meet and join to form one new river? When
this happens, they clash and hurl themselves at one another.
However, as the newly formed river flows downstream, it gradually
quiets down and flows smoothly again. And now it is broader
and more majestic and has more power. So it is in a marriage:
the forming of a new union may be tumultuous - but, when
achieved, the result is far greater than either partner alone.